Thoughts

[essay] 2018: thank you, next.

Dear 2018,

This is a letter for you.

Thank you for giving me such incredible lessons. Thank you for the rapid 365 days of my life, where I met such a wonderful group of people who have decided that my presence worth their times, as much as I value theirs. Thank you for giving me new family members with different languages, so now I am sure that I will feel safe and never lost, anywhere in the world. It has been amazing if I looked back to the start of this year, where I struggled even to start my final step in my education. Having nothing to expect, 2018 has given me the eyes to see who stays during the hardest times, the heart to be stronger to bear the loneliness, the bravery to fight what is worth to fight for. I have learned so much more about life, more than before.

I remembered writing my resolutions at the end of 2017 with fears and doubts of setting the bar too high. Never have I expected that I would mark them all down with my pink marker, as I thought I wouldn’t make my 9th and last goal. Ten days before 2019, the magic worked. Here I am right now, to be given the chance, to be working with something which is very dear to my heart, to be brave enough to finally take a step to my real passion, not anyone else’s. I smile today, from ear-to-ear, while looking at my photo album from the year.

2018 wouldn’t be perfect without all my friends and families. Despite the long distances and annoying time differences, I learn how to appreciate time and presence of my close friends and my family.

Dear 2018, thank you that I have learned about control, patience, persistence, honesty, and friendship this year. Thank you to teach me how to relax, how to love, how to celebrate, and how to be responsible. Thank you for testing me with your hard slaps on the face bunch of times. Thank you for the warm teas and quality conversations with my new family here. Thank you for the calm rain and warm touch of sun. Thank you for the sleepless nights and the surprise snow in October.

2018 Check(ed)list
+ Finish Master’s Thesis nicely and graduate
+ Finish reading at least 5 books from other genres that I use to read (I was a lazy reader before)
+ Watch Arctic Monkeys LIVE (Wishlist since 2006) with my bestfriend, Puspita
+ Be more social and participate in more social activities
+ Quit Instagram for a while and be more present
+ Be a happier, more grateful person
+ Write more blogs
+ Explore Gothenburg more and find new places
+ Join competitions (and surprisingly won, in the end)

Bonus surprises
+ Met Alicia Vikander
+ Did not win a second competition I 
entered, but ended up getting an offer to publish my work in the U.S. in collaboration with UNICEF

Lastly, I want highlight these experiences of 2018, to remind myself to always be grateful, and to make you, dear readers, believe that a dream is, in fact, a wish your heart makes. I know it will sound like I am talking in one of those American teen flicks with moral values speech at the end, but I am just going to say it anyway. If you wish hard enough and make it as a goal with a deadline, there will be a better chance your dreams will come true. Mine worked in 2018, some with 12 years of waiting, some with less time. Hope it will work for you. Have a f*ing awesome 2019!

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